relationships (Proverbs 17:1-28) Finding True Happiness

(Proverbs 17:1-28)

1   Better is a dry morsel and quietness with it 
     Than a house full of feasting with strife.
2   A servant who acts wisely will rule over a son who acts shamefully,
     And will share in the inheritance among brothers.
3   The refining pot is for silver and the furnace for gold,
     But the Lord tests hearts.
4   An evildoer listens to wicked lips;
     A liar pays attention to a destructive tongue.
5   One who mocks the poor taunts his Maker;
     One who rejoices at disaster will not go unpunished.
6   Grandchildren are the crown of the old,
     And the glory of sons is their fathers.
7   Excellent speech is not fitting for a fool,
     Much less are lying lips to a prince.
8   A bribe is a charm in the sight of its owner;
     Wherever he turns, he prospers.
9   One who conceals an offense seeks love,
     But one who repeats a matter separates close friends.
10 A rebuke goes deeper into one who has understanding 
     Than a hundred blows into a fool.
11 A rebellious person seeks only evil,
     So a cruel messenger will be sent against him.
12 Let a person meet a bear robbed of her cubs,
     Rather than a fool in his foolishness.
13 One who returns evil for good,
     Evil will not depart from his house.
14 The beginning of strife is like letting out water,
     So abandon the quarrel before it breaks out.
15 One who justifies the wicked and one who condemns the righteous,
     Both of them alike are an abomination to the Lord.
16 Why is there money in the hand of a fool to buy wisdom,
     When he has no sense?
17 A friend loves at all times,
     And a brother is born for adversity.
18 A person lacking in sense shakes hands 
     And becomes guarantor in the presence of his neighbor.
19 One who loves wrongdoing loves strife;
     One who makes his doorway high seeks destruction.
20 One who has a crooked mind finds nothing good,
     And one who is corrupted in his language falls into evil.
21 He who fathers a fool does so to his sorrow,
     And the father of a fool has no joy.
22 A joyful heart is good medicine,
     But a broken spirit dries up the bones.
23 A wicked person accepts a bribe from an inside pocket 
     To pervert the ways of justice.
24 Wisdom is in the presence of one who has understanding,
     But the eyes of a fool are on the ends of the earth.
25 A foolish son is a grief to his father,
     And bitterness to her who gave birth to him.
26 It is also not good to fine the righteous,
     Nor to strike the noble for their uprightness.
27 One who withholds his words has knowledge,
     And one who has a cool spirit is a person of understanding.
28 Even a fool, when he keeps silent, is considered wise;
     When he closes his lips, he is considered prudent.

TODAY'S THOUGHTS AND MEDITATION:

We all want to experience a happy life, but what do we have to do to achieve that?  Here we are given some really good advice which we can apply to our lives.  To be truly happy, we should want to live in peace, not fighting or arguing.  Whatever we say or do should be encouraging and edifying, not divisive or destructive.  If we strive to be just and fair, we will definitely not be happy when we see others struggle and suffer.  Those with good intentions will succeed and will want to help others, and share that with others.  

Respecting our family members is important.  Those who love, respect and have compassion towards all people, will forgive and be understanding, and never go around gossiping or seeking revenge.  Stay away from doing evil and those people who do evil.  And when we have done anything wrong, we should be very open to getting feedback, so that we can reconcile things, as well as mature.  

Very importantly, true happiness is to have the joy of the Lord in our hearts.  As well, to have understanding of God's word, so that we will not be deceived in how we interpret and apply the scriptures.  As believers gain wisdom, we will understand that in order to live in God's will and have a fulfilling, peaceful and joyful life here on earth, all we have to do is ask and allow God to work in and through us.  

Because God looks at our hearts, it is our hearts that we need to give to Him so that He can make them pure, changing us from the inside out.  Since God is holy and good, as our hearts desire what God desires, then our motives in what we say and do will be pure and righteous.  But since we still struggle with sin, even though we won't lose our salvation, we should want to continually go to the Lord for His wisdom, guidance and help, even and especially when we are serving others and doing good deeds.

When believers get to heaven, we will not be judged for our sins, because God has forgiven us.  He will judge our good deeds and put them through the refining fire.  For those deeds that do not burn up because they were done with pure motives, we will be rewarded.  For now, though, we will be blessed with the Lord's joy, when we do all things in the Lord's strength, righteousness, wisdom and love, all for His glory.

relationships (Proverbs 16:1-33) Making Wise Goals and Plans

(Proverbs 16:1-33)

1  The plans of the heart belong to a person,
     But the answer of the tongue is from the Lord.
2   All the ways of a person are clean in his own sight,
     But the Lord examines the motives.
3   Commit your works to the Lord,
     And your plans will be established.
4   The Lord has made everything for its own purpose,
     Even the wicked for the day of evil.
5   Everyone who is proud in heart is an abomination to the Lord;
     Be assured, he will not go unpunished.
6   By mercy and truth atonement is made for wrongdoing,
     And by the fear of the Lord one keeps away from evil.
7   When a person’s ways are pleasing to the Lord,
     He causes even his enemies to make peace with him.
8   Better is a little with righteousness 
     Than great income with injustice.
9   The mind of a person plans his way,
     But the Lord directs his steps.
10 A divine verdict is on the lips of the king;
     His mouth should not err in judgment.
11 A just balance and scales belong to the Lord;
     All the weights of the bag are His concern.
12 It is an abomination for kings to commit wicked acts,
     Because a throne is established on righteousness.
13 Righteous lips are the delight of kings,
     And one who speaks right is loved.
14 The fury of a king is like messengers of death;
     But a wise person will appease it.
15 In the light of a king’s face is life,
     And his favor is like a cloud with the spring rain.
16 How much better it is to get wisdom than gold!
     And to get understanding is to be chosen above silver.
17 The highway of the upright is to turn away from evil;
     One who watches his way protects his life.
18 Pride goes before destruction,
     And a haughty spirit before stumbling.
19 It is better to be humble in spirit with the needy 
     Than to divide the spoils with the proud.
20 One who pays attention to the word will find good,
     And blessed is one who trusts in the Lord.
21 The wise in heart will be called understanding,
     And sweetness of speech increases persuasiveness.
22 Understanding is a fountain of life to those who have it,
     But the discipline of fools is foolishness.
23 The heart of the wise instructs his mouth 
     And adds persuasiveness to his lips.
24 Pleasant words are a honeycomb,
     Sweet to the soul and healing to the bones.
25 There is a way which seems right to a person,
     But its end is the way of death.
26 A worker’s appetite works for him,
     For his hunger urges him on.
27 A worthless person digs up evil,
     While his words are like scorching fire.
28 A perverse person spreads strife,
     And a slanderer separates close friends.
29 A person of violence entices his neighbor 
     And leads him in a way that is not good.
30 He who winks his eyes does so to devise perverse things;
     He who compresses his lips brings evil to pass.
31 A gray head is a crown of glory;
     It is found in the way of righteousness.
32 One who is slow to anger is better than the mighty,
     And one who rules his spirit, than one who captures a city.
33 The lot is cast into the lap,
     But its every decision is from the Lord.

TODAY'S THOUGHTS AND MEDITATION:

I can really get in my own way, either by rushing into a project without enough thought, or by getting stuck in my own head as I try to sort things out on my own.  So, in order to be God-led, I need to step aside, then fall in step with the Lord while looking up to Him, to ask questions, and then to eagerly yet patiently wait for His answers!  Even if a plan seems really good, there isn't really a guarantee that it will happen, and that's not a bad thing.  God might be protecting us from something that we don't know about.  And/or, God might have a much better plan for us!

(James 4:15)  Instead, you ought to say, “If the Lord wills, we will live and also do this or that.”

(Jeremiah 29:11)  For I know the plans that I have for you,’ declares the Lord, ‘plans for prosperity and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.

People generally have plans and desires, even if that is to have no aspirations and do nothing.  But what the flesh wants and what we want is not at all reliable.  So the questions should be, "What does God want?"  "Is this idea within God's will?"  Even a king's throne can only be established in righteousness.  

(Luke 14:28-30) For which one of you, when he wants to build a tower, does not first sit down and calculate the cost, to see if he has enough to complete it? 29 Otherwise, when he has laid a foundation and is not able to finish, all who are watching it will begin to ridicule him, 30 saying, ‘This person began to build, and was not able to finish!’

So, not only should we have plans and desires for our lives, it is wise to plan things out!  In this chapter, we see quite a few valuable things to keep in mind as we go through life, making decisions, goals and plans.  The entire Bible has so many valuable instructions, that we need to continually grow in God's wisdom and knowledge by studying His word daily.  And there should be an increasing appetite for His nourishment and strength.

Understand that God created everything with purpose, and has a purpose for each one of us.  It is up to each person to decide if we want to live for ourselves, or live for the Lord.  Understanding that God wants the best for us, and has given us the instructions necessary, will help us pursue and build what is eternal.  

Our motives in everything we say and do should be guided by God's love, as well as His will, which is righteousness.  This is also to remain humble in our deep respect for the Lord.  The opposite of this is the destruction of pride, arrogance and the love of money.  Therefore, make and carry out our plans, all to the Lord's glory, all in His strength and wisdom.

We should not involve ourselves with evil people and evil actions.  Continue assessing our lives, and if God reveals to us any sinful behavior, it is to our benefit to confess those, and then continue on in the Lord's mercy and truth, depending on Him and putting Him first, ahead of all things.  Our faith and trust in the Lord will be demonstrated by our obedience and in our character.  Therefore, we will strive to be just and fair, being peacemakers, being slow to anger and having self-control.

The benefits of doing all these things is pleasing to the Lord, and He will then establish our lives on a solid foundation.  Things will work out for good.  And we will have better relationships with those around us.  So when we walk alongside the Lord in His will, with the desire of accomplishing His plans and desires, in His wisdom, strength and righteousness, He will establish our way.

relationships (Proverbs 15:1-33) Important Conversations

(Proverbs 15:1-33)

1   A gentle answer turns away wrath,
     But a harsh word stirs up anger.
2   The tongue of the wise makes knowledge pleasant,
     But the mouth of fools spouts foolishness.
3   The eyes of the Lord are in every place,
     Watching the evil and the good.
4   A soothing tongue is a tree of life,
     But perversion in it crushes the spirit.
5   A fool rejects his father’s discipline,
     But he who complies with rebuke is sensible.
6   Great wealth is in the house of the righteous,
     But trouble is in the income of the wicked.
7   The lips of the wise spread knowledge,
     But the hearts of fools are not so.
8   The sacrifice of the wicked is an abomination to the Lord,
     But the prayer of the upright is His delight.
9   The way of the wicked is an abomination to the Lord,
     But He loves the one who pursues righteousness.
10 There is severe punishment for one who abandons the way;
     One who hates a rebuke will die.
11 Sheol and Abaddon lie open before the Lord,
     How much more the hearts of mankind!
12 A scoffer does not love one who rebukes him;
     He will not go to the wise.
13 A joyful heart makes a cheerful face,
     But when the heart is sad, the spirit is broken.
14 The mind of the intelligent seeks knowledge,
     But the mouth of fools feeds on foolishness.
15 All the days of the needy are bad,
     But a cheerful heart has a continual feast.
16 Better is a little with the fear of the Lord 
     Than great treasure, and turmoil with the treasure.
17 Better is a portion of vegetables where there is love,
     Than a fattened ox served with hatred.
18 A hot-tempered person stirs up strife,
     But the slow to anger calms a dispute.
19 The way of the lazy one is like a hedge of thorns,
     But the path of the upright is a highway.
20 A wise son makes a father glad,
     But a foolish man despises his mother.
21 Foolishness is joy to one who lacks sense,
     But a person of understanding walks straight.
22 Without consultation, plans are frustrated,
     But with many counselors they succeed.
23 A person has joy in an apt answer,
     And how delightful is a timely word!
24 The path of life leads upward for the wise,
     So that he may keep away from Sheol below.
25 The Lord will tear down the house of the proud,
     But He will set the boundary of the widow.
26 Evil plans are an abomination to the Lord,
     But pleasant words are pure.
27 He who profits illicitly troubles his own house,
     But he who hates bribes will live.
28 The heart of the righteous ponders how to answer,
     But the mouth of the wicked pours out evil things.
29 The Lord is far from the wicked,
     But He hears the prayer of the righteous.
30 Bright eyes gladden the heart;
     Good news refreshes the bones.
31 One whose ear listens to a life-giving rebuke 
     Will stay among the wise.
32 One who neglects discipline rejects himself,
     But one who listens to a rebuke acquires understanding.
33 The fear of the Lord is the instruction for wisdom,
     And before honor comes humility.

TODAY'S THOUGHTS AND MEDITATION:

It can be very difficult not to react to statements or questions, especially around trigger-topics!  Before I meet up with people, or call family members, even if it is just to catch up, I've been trying to pray!  I pray specifically for the conversations to go well, that God keeps my heart calm and bridles my tongue - and please, please, please give me wisdom!!!  

Reading this passage, I just had an ah-ha moment!  To temper our anger or potential anger, we need to deeply respect and remind ourselves to desire God's way.  It is when we get caught up in wanting our own way in things and then not getting our our way - that we become frustrated and angry - because we've just made it personal.  But if we are wanting to accomplish things God's way in His will, then it all has to do with Him, and He can sort things out!!!  WOW!!!  If only this was in mind last week!!!

Recently, I had two different conversations on the phone.  On the first one, I actually answered a question with calmness, and what I said was perfectly fine... but apparently not for the other end.  They blew up, and all I heard for 30 minutes was contentious yelling.  And I know it wasn't really aimed at me, it was the situation.  

Then a few days later, when I was speaking with someone else, and they asked me the same question, - I - "blew up".  I'm not going to brag and say that my blowup was much calmer... it certainly was impassioned because I've been so sick and tired of not being able to speak my mind on certain things.  THIS is not an excuse, and it was totally unnecessary!!!  Because, of course, there were impassioned reactions from the other side.  And so, for a few minutes, we at least tried to tone it down.

Now listen, there are some topics that are best to avoid if possible, but there will be those discussions which need to happen.  This is when we definitely need God's wisdom and help.  And I really need to remember that I can take my time in responding to statements or in answering questions!  So, within those moments, I should NOT be thinking about how I can cleverly respond, but instead, be asking God to give me the right words!  In in that moment, I can ask Him:

- how can I best respond or answer a question so that it is "pleasant" while still being founded in truth

- should I even respond or answer a question

- or is there maybe a question that I can ask instead

It's very important to remember that it isn't just how we say something, but WHAT we say.  In the past, I've been in several conversations with people (who were caught up in a "Christian" cult, which taught the women to always speak "demurely", or else).  But wow, even when the tone is soft and even-keel, what is said can be very judgmental, manipulative and condescending!  

Yep, in several of those conversations, I fell into the trap of feeling indignation and frustration, and my responses were rude.  I didn't raise my voice much, but what I said was certainly snippy, as well, which only somehow proved a point in the minds of those other women.  I did apologize to them.  But only one of those women apologized to me once she realized her words were not godly, but self-serving.  After that, the two of us were able to move forward in our friendship.   

As for the others, even though I had apologized and they said that they forgave me, they remained stuck in their self-righteousness and simply avoided me.  Somehow they still saw me as an enemy, because they still had an angry gnawing in their gut.  When we experience this feeling, it is wise to do a self-check and see if there are any logs in our own eyes.

Many other things can be said with a soothing-like tongue, but if it isn't godly, it is just as destructive as a tongue that is heated and contentious.  Someone who has grown up respecting and listening to the discipline and instructions of their parents, are more likely to accept discipline and instructions from the Lord, as well as from fellow believers, mentors and spiritual leaders.  

It is always wise to consider the feedback that we get, so that we can apologize if needed, and we can learn and adjust in how and what we do and say.  We should always keep learning and maturing... because until we get to heaven, none of us can claim that we "have arrived".  In fact, the older I get, the more I realize - I need God and His word, MORE and MORE!!!

The more we diligently and humbly live by the Lord's righteousness and wisdom (and not our own self-righteousness and thinking), the "richer" our homelife will be, because it will be filled with the Lord's peace, hope and joy.  Just going through the motions will help our situations to a point, but this will not please the Lord, because those efforts are only being done in one's own strength.  And sin, unrepented or not confessed, will impede our prayers.  The Lord wants us to know Him personally by being born-again (by receiving His gift of forgiveness, salvation and eternal life), to be clothed in His righteousness, and then trust in His perfect guidance, continually relying on His strength and help, and resting in His care, peace, hope and love.  

But wait, there's more!  In walking closely with the Lord, we will experience His joy and goodness in all circumstances.  With this, we will be thankful in all things, which will help us be content in all things, which will help us be gracious and love others.  We can better edify, comfort, encourage and bring healing to others.  And our outlook on life and our attitudes towards others will be different, as the Lord changes us from the inside out.  

The summary is simple.  The most important relationship is with the Lord.  And the most important conversations we can ever have is with the Lord.  And this will help us to have better and healthier relationships and conversations with others.

relationships (Proverbs 14:1-35) Wisdom is Reasonable

(Proverbs 14:1-35)

1   The wise woman builds her house,
     But the foolish tears it down with her own hands.
2   One who walks in his uprightness fears the Lord,
     But one who is devious in his ways despises Him.
3   In the mouth of the foolish is a rod for his back,
     But the lips of the wise will protect them.
4    Where there are no oxen, the manger is clean;
     But much revenue comes by the strength of the ox.
5   A trustworthy witness will not lie,
     But a false witness declares lies.
6    A scoffer seeks wisdom and finds none,
     But knowledge is easy for one who has understanding.
7    Leave the presence of a fool,
     Or you will not discern words of knowledge.
8    The wisdom of the sensible is to understand his way,
     But the foolishness of fools is deceit.
9    Fools mock at sin,
     But among the upright there is goodwill.
10 The heart knows its own bitterness,
     And a stranger does not share its joy.
11 The house of the wicked will be destroyed,
     But the tent of the upright will flourish.
12 There is a way which seems right to a person,
     But its end is the way of death.
13 Even in laughter the heart may be in pain,
     And the end of joy may be grief.
14 One with a wayward heart will have his fill of his own ways,
     But a good person will be satisfied with his.
15 The naive believes everything,
     But the sensible person considers his steps.
16 A wise person is cautious and turns away from evil,
     But a fool is arrogant and careless.
17 A quick-tempered person acts foolishly,
     And a person of evil devices is hated.
18 The naive inherit foolishness,
     But the sensible are crowned with knowledge.
19 The evil will bow down before the good,
     And the wicked at the gates of the righteous.
20 The poor is hated even by his neighbor,
     But those who love the rich are many.
21 One who despises his neighbor sins,
     But one who is gracious to the poor is blessed.
22 Will they who devise evil not go astray?
     But kindness and truth will be to those who devise good.
23 In all labor there is profit,
     But mere talk leads only to poverty.
24 The crown of the wise is their riches,
     But the foolishness of fools is simply foolishness.
25 A truthful witness saves lives,
     But one who declares lies is deceitful.
26 In the fear of the Lord there is strong confidence,
     And his children will have refuge.
27 The fear of the Lord is a fountain of life,
     By which one may avoid the snares of death.
28 In a multitude of people is a king’s glory,
     But in the scarcity of people is a prince’s ruin.
29 One who is slow to anger has great understanding;
     But one who is quick-tempered exalts foolishness.
30 A tranquil heart is life to the body,
     But jealousy is rottenness to the bones.
31 One who oppresses the poor taunts his Maker,
     But one who is gracious to the needy honors Him.
32 The wicked is thrust down by his own wrongdoing,
     But the righteous has a refuge when he dies.
33 Wisdom rests in the heart of one who has understanding,
     But among fools it is made known.
34 Righteousness exalts a nation,
     But sin is a disgrace to any people.
35 The king’s favor is toward a servant who acts wisely,
     But his anger is toward him who acts shamefully.

TODAY'S THOUGHTS AND MEDITATION:

If anyone behaves disrespectfully towards a police officer, it will not go well.  The wisest thing we can do is cooperate with authority, whether they are right or wrong.  While remaining calm and levelheaded, we can always appeal or lodge a complaint later, using facts and evidence.  Now, people are not perfect, but God is.  So, how well will it go with those who choose to disrespect God, the One who judges with truth and righteousness?  Those who live in His righteousness will be protected, because they have received His free gift of forgiveness and salvation, and are guaranteed eternal life with Him.  In Him, we will find peace, contentment, hope and true joy.

Without God, people have to make up their own direction/s in life, which will be based on their fickle feelings, self-centered desires and limited knowledge.  This way is ripe with arrogance, jealousy, hatred and uncertainty.  This way is futile and only leads to death.  We get a glimpse of the futility in verses 13-15.  

Comparing the world's kingdom vs God's kingdom, the world's kingdom embraces entertainment, which is passive and a form of escape and deception.  Actors are only pretending to be something that they are not.  And viewers often take what they see, to apply to their own lives, trying to emulate fictitious "happily-ever-after" endings.  Therefore, those who want to live by their fleshly desires will hate God and His instructions.  Those who are evil, see sin and crime as a game to play.  And those who want to appear good, will only mask the sins that they hide inside.

When a person humbly repents of their sins, the Lord sets us free from sin and clothes us in His righteousness.  Therefore, God's kingdom is one of celebration, which requires participation within a group of others who share the same joy and direction in life.  When we live in the Lord's will, we have purpose and direction, with excellent instructions in order to keep us on the right path.  And the wise will seek to understand why things work or don't work.  Instead of reacting to something (whether it is with sadness or anger), stop to figure out the facts.  God's truths are reasonable, and make complete and perfect sense.  And we can actually observe the outcomes and see that God works things out for good when we apply biblical instructions with goodwill intentions and with cautious and prayerful consideration.

In showing love to our neighbor, we have to know that this isn't just talking about those who live right next to us.  This is talking about those in the next community... in the next country... it is talking about all people.  Practically speaking, God wants us to be Spirit-led in all things.  So as we go through life, and we realize someone's need and are prompted to help or serve in some way, when we step up, God will equip us and strengthen us.  

We can love everyone, and be gracious to those in need, because God is rich with resources, and He is faithful provide.  And if anyone has wronged us, when we forgive them, as the Lord forgives us, we are delivered from anger and bitterness.  Otherwise, our hearts will struggle to embrace and enjoy peace, joy and love.  This in itself will compromise our relationships.  Forgiving those who hurt us, as well as confessing our sins, are necessary in maintaining a healthy life, and healthy relationships, with the Lord and others!

If we awesomely respect the Lord, we will be striving to live in His righteousness, with a strong confidence.  So, instead of talking about things that we are against, which only helps to tear down and destroy, we should be talking about the things we are for, which is to be serving, encouraging, building up and life-giving.  But just talking about it isn't that effective.  If we are passionate about a need somewhere, that means God is calling us to do something!  Part of growing in our personal relationship with the Lord is to be attentively listening to His directions, and then talking to Him about walking-that-walk together!

relationships (Proverbs 13:1-25) Valuable Relationships

(Proverbs 13:1-25)

1   A wise son accepts his father’s discipline,
     But a scoffer does not listen to rebuke.
2   From the fruit of a person’s mouth he enjoys good,
     But the desire of the treacherous is violence.
3   One who guards his mouth protects his life;
     One who opens wide his lips comes to ruin.
4   The soul of the lazy one craves and gets nothing,
     But the soul of the diligent is made prosperous.
5   A righteous person hates a false statement,
     But a wicked person acts disgustingly and shamefully.
6   Righteousness guards the one whose way is blameless,
     But wickedness brings the sinner to ruin.
7    There is one who pretends to be rich but has nothing;
     Another pretends to be poor, but has great wealth.
8    The ransom of a person’s life is his wealth,
     But the poor hears no rebuke.
9   The light of the righteous rejoices,
     But the lamp of the wicked goes out.
10 Through overconfidence comes nothing but strife,
     But wisdom is with those who receive counsel.
11 Wealth obtained from nothing dwindles,
     But one who gathers by labor increases it.
12 Hope deferred makes the heart sick,
     But desire fulfilled is a tree of life.
13 One who despises the word will do badly,
     But one who fears the commandment will be rewarded.
14 The teaching of the wise is a fountain of life,
     To turn aside from the snares of death.
15 Good understanding produces favor,
     But the way of the treacherous is their own disaster.
16 Every prudent person acts with knowledge,
     But a fool displays foolishness.
17 A wicked messenger falls into adversity,
     But a faithful messenger brings healing.
18 Poverty and shame will come to one who neglects discipline,
     But one who complies with rebuke will be honored.
19 Desire realized is sweet to the soul,
     But it is an abomination to fools to turn away from evil.
20 One who walks with wise people will be wise,
     But a companion of fools will suffer harm.
21   Adversity pursues sinners,
     But the righteous will be rewarded with prosperity.
22 A good person leaves an inheritance to his grandchildren,
     And the wealth of a sinner is stored up for the righteous.
23 Abundant food is in the uncultivated ground of the poor,
     But it is swept away by injustice.
24 He who withholds his rod hates his son,
     But he who loves him disciplines him diligently.
25 The righteous has enough to satisfy his appetite,
     But the stomach of the wicked is in need.

TODAY'S THOUGHTS AND MEDITATION:

The person who relies on their own self-righteousness and their own means to get rich and to do good in order to save themselves, will lose everything after they die.  The person who is lazy and wants other people to do everything for them will be poor, physically and/or spiritually.  But the person who humbles themselves (who becomes poor in spirit), realizing their need for Jesus and His salvation and His righteousness, has riches waiting for them in heaven.  

Meanwhile, God blesses the righteous here on earth.  It may or may not be with monetary wealth, but the person who has given everything to the Lord to manage will understand that life is not about having physical wealth.  That person will be very thankful and content with whatever God does give them, because they understand - as they trust Him - God will see to their every need!

What does this have to do with relationships?  Well, in our personal relationship with the Lord, we will be rich in spirit, and enriched with the Lord's peace and joy.  In all of this, as well as understanding and continually embracing God's will, we can foster and nurture better relationships with others.  Also, we can see the value in having other solid Christians as friends and mentors.  Iron sharpens iron.

Notice (in verse 10) that being overconfident brings strife.  An arrogant attitude not only pushes people away, it is an attitude that says, "I don't need anyone!  I can do this all on my own!"  So while we are to be confident, we are never to be arrogant.  We are to continually remain humble, always relying on the Lord, because it is the Lord who will give us the proper confidence and strength that we need.  And in this complete reliance upon the Lord, we can be rooted securely in His truth and in His word, which gives us the wisest of advice!

Parents are told right here, if we just let our children do what they want, they will not know how to navigate life to the fullest, and could very easily fall into dangerous situations.  But if we teach our children the importance of having a relationship with the Lord, and the value of following His instructions, things will work out for good.  This includes how they speak, what they do, as well as what they desire in their hearts.  And then, when they do disobey, immediately and appropriately, we need to have a teaching moment, alongside appropriately measured consequences.  

As parents, everything that we say and do should be so that our children will understand how things work in the world so they can avoid deceptions.  And very importantly, they should learn to understand God's truth, and how the Lord works in the world, and in us.  Our job as parents is to equip our children so that they can go out into the world and successfully live in the Lord's will.

Children are told to respect their parents and listen to their discipline, which is not just about willingly receiving consequences, it is mostly about following what they are teaching.  It really helps children when they understand WHY we should or should not do something.  And this understanding needs to be linked to what God says in His word.

It most definitely helps to understand that when one becomes a believer, the Lord changes us from the inside-out, so that it will be easier to behave and react towards things as we should.  It is a discipline to remind ourselves and put into practice desiring and loving the things that God desires and loves.  It is also a discipline to remind ourselves and put into practice asking the Lord for His love, strength and help, and then He will work in and through us!

relationships (Proverbs 12:14-28) The Most Resourceful Relationships

(Proverbs 12:14-28)

14 A person will be satisfied with good by the fruit of his words,
     And the deeds of a person’s hands will return to him.
15 The way of a fool is right in his own eyes,
     But a person who listens to advice is wise.
16 A fool’s anger is known at once,
     But a prudent person conceals dishonor.
17 One who declares truth tells what is right,
     But a false witness, deceit.
18 There is one who speaks rashly like the thrusts of a sword,
     But the tongue of the wise brings healing.
19 Truthful lips will endure forever,
     But a lying tongue is only for a moment.
20 Deceit is in the heart of those who devise evil,
     But counselors of peace have joy.
21 No harm happens to the righteous,
     But the wicked are filled with trouble.
22 Lying lips are an abomination to the Lord,
     But those who deal faithfully are His delight.
23 A prudent person conceals knowledge,
     But the heart of fools proclaims foolishness.
24 The hand of the diligent will rule,
     But the lazy hand will be put to forced labor.
25 Anxiety in a person’s heart weighs it down,
     But a good word makes it glad.
26 The righteous person is a guide to his neighbor,
     But the way of the wicked leads them astray.
27 A lazy person does not roast his prey,
     But the precious possession of a person is diligence.
28 In the way of righteousness there is life,
     And in its pathway there is no death.

TODAY'S THOUGHTS AND MEDITATION:

We have to remember that Christianity is not about living by do's and don'ts, it is all about having a personal relationship with the Lord.  And this will make sense when we dissect these verses into the do's and the don'ts.  Because what we do and say is the evidence of what is in our hearts.  And what we sow is what we will reap.

We are all born with a sinful nature.  So in our own strength and wisdom, no one can be perfect, which is required in order to get into heaven, because God is holy and cannot have a relationship with sin.  So without God in our lives, one can only try to be good in their own strength and wisdom.  The problem with this is that one is only tapping into a very limited resource.  God is perfect, we are NOT!

With our feeble, limited thinking, we would be foolish to think that we don't need any help in figuring things out!  And when we do think we have all the answers, since our thinking is only based on self-centered, selfish desires, we will most certainly run into opposition and frustration.  And it is laziness that tires to cut corners wherever one can, which is dangerous because one can neglect important details in life that can hurt, damage or make one sick.

When a person doesn't address their pride and arrogance, they will be greedy and deceitful, which are all evil in God's eyes.  Not only will those who are wicked lead others astray with their lies, a person actually is lying to themselves which will keep them from finding truth.  There's a saying that goes something like, "If you are going to lie, you better have a good memory," because when you start with one lie, you will have to try to cover that up with another, and another, etc.  And the more one talks, the more likely they will stumble and prove their ignorance and evil intentions.

It's telling, when a person lashes out in anger right after being hurt or insulted.  Reacting rashly will only do more damage to others and as well as to oneself, since one would only have themselves in mind.  So, we can see how the wicked can be filled with trouble and anxiety, which will bring them down.  A drowning man tends to do whatever they can (right or wrong) in order to save themselves.  And in grabbing another person, the risk is that both will drown.

Well, spiritually, no one can save themselves.  Jesus is the only one who can save.  When we repent of our sins, He forgives us and we are reborn.  At the same time we are given the indwelling Holy Spirit of promise to change us from the inside out, and is always there to guide and help us.  

As we ask and allow the Lord to work for us, in us, and through us, we are tapping into a resource that is beyond, because the Lord is omnipotent, omniscient and omnipresent.  Therefore, if a person has God in their lives and is walking closely with Him, we will become more and more like him, which will be evident in the things that we do and say.

Remember, whatever we sow we will reap!  So when our words and actions are Spirit-led, they are fruitful, and good will come out of this, bringing healing to others as well as satisfaction to our own lives.  Those who seek and promote peace will experience joy.  When we live in God's righteousness, we are protected, because God's truth endures forever.  Therefore, we are wise to listen to advice.  

In more practical ways, no matter the circumstance, it is never wise to try to prove how smart we are.  Even if we are smart and don't stumble over our facts, this just never goes over well.  I mean, the more one talks, the less people hear.  It really is counterproductive.  As well, we should keep in mind that it is not wise to react when we are insulted or hurt.  We should get the facts first, and then with God's wisdom, seek reconciliation, with love as our motive.  

When we speak and do things with love and good intentions, we can bring about peace and make people glad.  In God's righteousness there is life, and we can help guide others to eternal life, as well as to a healthier, purposeful and fulfilling life here on earth.  And God is pleased and will bless us in our faithfulness and diligence, which is to live out the evidence of having Him in our heart!  Jesus is the best and most resourceful relationship one could ever have!