relationships (Ecclesiastes 6:1-12) The Relationship of Eternity

(Ecclesiastes 6:1-12)

There is an evil which I have seen under the sun, and it is widespread among mankind: 2 a person to whom God has given riches, wealth, and honor, so that his soul lacks nothing of all that he desires, yet God has not given him the opportunity to enjoy these things, but a foreigner enjoys them. This is futility and a severe affliction. 3 If a man fathers a hundred children and lives many years, however many they may be, but his soul is not satisfied with good things and he does not even have a proper burial, then I say, “Better the miscarriage than he, 4 for a miscarriage comes in futility and goes into darkness; and its name is covered in darkness. 5 It has not even seen the sun nor does it know it; yet it is better off than that man. 6 Even if the man lives a thousand years twice, but does not see good things—do not all go to one and the same place?”

7 All a person’s labor is for his mouth, and yet his appetite is not satisfied. 8 For what advantage does the wise person have over the fool? What does the poor person have, knowing how to walk before the living? 9 What the eyes see is better than what the soul desires. This too is futility and striving after wind.

10 Whatever exists has already been named, and it is known what man is; for he cannot dispute with the one who is mightier than he is. 11 For there are many words which increase futility. What then is the advantage to a person? 12 For who knows what is good for a person during his lifetime, during the few years of his futile life? He will spend them like a shadow. For who can tell a person what will happen after him under the sun?

TODAY'S THOUGHTS AND MEDITATION:

All good things are from God, and for right now, even the wicked are able to have good things.  But without God in their lives, they will still feel empty and dissatisfied, no matter how many family members or friends one might have.  And whatever one might acquire here on earth, it will never be enough, and it will all be lost.  As for power, people can seek to build themselves up in their own strength, but there will always be someone stronger, who may or may not take advantage of you.  

As verse 9 alludes to, people usually tend to think that "the grass is greener on the other side" - that - somehow, there must be more.  But more of what?  More of the same, will only be more of exactly the same.  If only one will open their eyes to see the truth that has always been right there in front of us! 

Then, looking closely at verse 10, there is more truth behind its statement.  In the grandest of scales, God has always been, and God is Sovereign.  There is no one more powerful than He.  In fact, He is stronger than all powers put together.  And everyone will have to stand before Him as their judge, whether to be judged by one's sins, or judged according to good deeds done with right movies.  The latter will only happen if one has humbly accepted the Lord Jesus Christ's forgiveness, which is His free gift of salvation.

Even though the Lord is all-powerful, He still will not force Himself on anyone, because He is good, and He loves us.  If one does not want a personal relationship with Him, then one is also rejecting all of the good things that are from God after one dies.  But in seeking out a personal relationship with Jesus Christ, we will find forgiveness, protection, strength, wisdom, nourishment, fulfillment, joy and peace, as well as eternal security, treasures, perfection and satisfaction.  The decision is ours to make... a relationship with the fallen, broken world, or a relationship with the God of eternal life, love and goodness.

relationships (Proverbs 7:1-27) Surround Ourselves With Those Who Love Us

(Proverbs 7:1-27) 

1   My son, keep my words 
     And treasure my commandments within you.
2   Keep my commandments and live,
     And my teaching as the apple of your eye.
3   Bind them on your fingers;
     Write them on the tablet of your heart.
4   Say to wisdom, “You are my sister,”
     And call understanding your intimate friend,
5   So that they may keep you from an adulteress,
     From the foreigner who flatters with her words.

6   For at the window of my house 
     I looked out through my lattice,
7   And I saw among the naive,
     And discerned among the youths 
     A young man lacking sense,
8   Passing through the street near her corner;
     And he walks along the way to her house,
9   In the twilight, in the evening,
     In the middle of the night and the darkness.
10 And behold, a woman comes to meet him,
     Dressed as a prostitute and cunning of heart.
11 She is boisterous and rebellious,
     Her feet do not remain at home;
12 She is now in the streets, now in the public squares,
     And lurks by every corner.
13 So she seizes him and kisses him,
     And with a brazen face she says to him:
14 “I was due to offer peace offerings;
     Today I have paid my vows.
15 Therefore I have come out to meet you,
     To seek your presence diligently, and I have found you.
16 I have spread my couch with coverings,
     With colored linens of Egypt.
17 I have sprinkled my bed 
     With myrrh, aloes, and cinnamon.
18 Come, let’s drink our fill of love until morning;
     Let’s delight ourselves with caresses.
19 For my husband is not at home;
     He has gone on a long journey.
20 He has taken a bag of money with him.
     At the full moon he will come home.”
21 With her many persuasions she entices him;
     With her flattering lips she seduces him.
22 Suddenly he follows her 
     As an ox goes to the slaughter,
     Or as one walks in ankle bracelets to the discipline of a fool,
23 Until an arrow pierces through his liver;
     As a bird hurries to the snare,
     So he does not know that it will cost him his life.

24 Now therefore, my sons, listen to me,
     And pay attention to the words of my mouth.
25 Do not let your heart turn aside to her ways,
     Do not stray into her paths.
26 For many are the victims she has brought to ruin,
     And numerous are all those slaughtered by her.
27 Her house is the way to Sheol,
     Descending to the chambers of death.

TODAY'S THOUGHTS AND MEDITATION:

Just recently, I started to read these scriptures in Spanish as well as in English... NOT because my Spanish is that good, but because I want to really work on knowing and speaking more Spanish.  My Spanish is actually very pathetic, and learning another language has never been easy for me.  ENGLISH (my only language) hasn't been easy to learn!!!  And as I get older, it becomes even more challenging.  BUT it is never too late, and we are never too old to learn.  In fact, we should continue learning and growing - especially in the Lord.

All that to say, I've never understood the English idiom, "apple of my eye."  I mean, apples are okay, so, I just figured that whoever came up with that phrase must have really loved apples!  But, in verse 2, we are told to consider God's teachings as the apple of our eye.  Well, in Spanish, they say, "como a la niña de tus ojos."  A direct translation is "like a DAUGHTER of your eyes!"  

Wow, okay, even if you don't have children, you can just imagine how precious a little daughter is!  As a loving parent, we will want to protect her, embrace her and cherish her.  Hey, I have a daughter, and I know they have their moments of meltdowns and times when they are anything but cute, but they never stop being our daughter, and we never stop loving them.  But we also see and remember those moments when they demonstrate their adoring love, their nurturing, gentle nature, and their eagerness to help, serve and please us, with such great delight.

Another thing about daughters, is that as parents, we don't want to disappoint them.  I remember my parents advising one of their cousins about the dangers of pornography, because they had magazines out in the open for anyone to see... including their little daughter.  My parents asked him if he would be happy to see his daughter grow up to become a porn star, to be seen and treated like a worthless object of lust.  Oh!  Of course not!  Well, all of those women in those magazines and movies, are someone's daughters.  How sad is that?!  He did remove the magazines.  And eventually, he and his entire family become Christians!  

So, there's also that aspect of how our daughters (as well as sons) so closely watch and learn from us.  It is amazing, and sometimes alarming, as to what they will all pick up.  And most often they will copy us in what we do!  Therefore, if we love our children, we will not only cherish them and protect them, but we will also live in such a way that we will teach them how they should try to live.  Being an example is another way that we protect, teach and demonstrate our love to our children.  Live as if your child is closely watching us at all times, and know that God definitely sees and knows everything!

Then, we see in verse 4, we are to consider wisdom as our sister.  Even if you don't have a sister, maybe you can imagine how blunt a sister who loves you can be.  Since I am the older sister of two brothers, I can see how I have certain insights and "privileges" regarding how I can speak to my brothers.  Since I know them so well, I also can anticipate how they are probably going to react to anything that I do say.  And because we are family, I love them, they know that I love them, and nothing will change the fact that we are so closely related.  And when we truly love someone, the advice we try to give, is not meant to hurt them, but to help them.  

SAME THING with a very close friend!  Verse 4 tells us to consider understanding as an intimate friend... a very close friend who you can trust to confide in!  I've only had a few very good close friends in my life, because these are difficult to find.  These are the people who work to get to know us well, well enough to know our heart's intentions.  These are the ones who listen to us without judging.  Even when we mess up, they are the ones who won't unfriend us, or run away, or hold grudges, but stay to work things out.  And WHEN they give advice, these are the ones who will give us helpful, constructive advice to guide us towards God and His will.  

Therefore, to keep us away from the world of selfishness, self-centeredness and self-reliance, and its misleading desires and temptations, let's consider God's commandments (instructions) as a precious daughter who you want to protect;  consider God's wisdom like a sister who you know loves you and wants the best for you; and consider understanding (God and God's word) like a best friend who you trust with all the details of your life.  Life is so much better when we are surrounded by those who love us and want the best for us!  How much more should we surround ourselves with the Lord and everything He has to offer! 

relationships (Proverbs 5:1-23) Being Single and Being Married

(Proverbs 5:1-23) 

1   My son, pay attention to my wisdom,
     Incline your ear to my understanding,
2   So that you may maintain discretion 
     And your lips may comply with knowledge.
3   For the lips of an adulteress drip honey,
     And her speech is smoother than oil;
4   But in the end she is bitter as wormwood,
     Sharp as a two-edged sword.
5   Her feet go down to death,
     Her steps take hold of Sheol.
6   She does not ponder the path of life;
     Her ways are unstable, she does not know it.

7   Now then, my sons, listen to me 
     And do not turn away from the words of my mouth.
8   Keep your way far from her,
     And do not go near the door of her house,
9   Otherwise you will give your vigor to others,
     And your years to the cruel one;
10 And strangers will be filled with your strength,
     And your hard-earned possessions will go to the house of a foreigner;
11 And you will groan in the end,
     When your flesh and your body are consumed;
12 And you say, “How I hated instruction!
     And my heart disdainfully rejected rebuke!
13 I did not listen to the voice of my teachers,
     Nor incline my ear to my instructors!
14 I was almost in total ruin 
     In the midst of the assembly and congregation.”

15 Drink water from your own cistern,
     And fresh water from your own well.
16 Should your springs overflow into the street,
     Streams of water in the public squares?
17 Let them be yours alone,
     And not for strangers with you.
18 Let your fountain be blessed,
     And rejoice in the wife of your youth.
19 Like a loving doe and a graceful mountain goat,
     Let her breasts satisfy you at all times;
     Be exhilarated always with her love.
20 For why should you, my son, be exhilarated with an adulteress,
     And embrace the breasts of a foreigner?
21 For the ways of everyone are before the eyes of the Lord,
     And He observes all his paths.
22 His own wrongdoings will trap the wicked,
     And he will be held by the ropes of his sin.
23 He will die for lack of instruction,
     And in the greatness of his foolishness he will go astray.

TODAY'S THOUGHTS AND MEDITATION:

We are to be in the world but not of the world, so there is a line of discretion to consider, for both the single and the married, since God's will is that sex should be reserved for a man and woman who are married.  Take note that it was always intended that there only be ONE wife.  And for Christians, it is God's will that a believer only date and marry another believer.  Marriage is difficult enough, even when a couple is in complete agreement on all the very important aspects of life.

Here are a few things I learned and put into practice back when I was single.  Firstly and most importantly, I worked on my personal relationship with the Lord, and asked Him to help me, and protect me - which included protecting me from myself!  As well, I prayed for Him to already be working in the heart of my potential future spouse.  Since I had no idea when or if I would even get married, I also asked God to give me peace, fulfillment and contentment.  

Being content in all things is so very important - even in being single!  There is less of a chance that one becomes desperate and makes a lifelong stupid mistake and ends up living in a desperate and/or miserable situation.  This is also good practice for if and when one does get married.  If you think marriage is going to complete you, or fulfill your life, or be the answers to a lot of your problems - NOT TRUE!!!  When we put our spouse in place of God, with unreasonable expectations, they will let us down... because, guess what, they are NOT God!!!  They are not perfect.

Another thing that helped me as a single (and I did this in middle school, already) was to write out a list of all the pros and cons as to why I should save myself for marriage.  The only thing in the con-column was "temporary satisfaction".  And even that is not a guarantee.  And if there is temporary satisfaction, there are so many ramifications that go along with this.  The biggest thing is that sex is an emotional and spiritual "marriage".  God created us this way, so that when a man and woman make their vows and then consummate that covenant, the two become one flesh.  If you ever wondered why everyone will remember "the first one", this is exactly why.

My pro-column included many things like: no STDs, no unwanted pregnancies, there wouldn't be any basis to compare my future spouse with anyone else...  because the most important sexual organ that we have - is our minds.  Whatever we do before marriage is what we will take into our marriage.  Even looking at pornography!  Don't think for one minute that this is harmless.

Now, think of the most beautiful gift you can give your spouse.  Saving yourself for marriage means that you have remained faithful to your spouse your entire life, even before you knew them.  This is so honorable and attractive.  If your spouse has done this for you as well, how much more can you trust them to remain faithful.  We will know someone is a believer when we see fruit of the Spirit, and one of those fruits is self-control.

Therefore, whether single or married, avoid temptation and stay away from it, as far as possible.  It is not a sin to be tempted, but it is a sin to become obsessed with the idea of it, and most certainly it is a sin to act on it.  Women, we are not exempt!  Not just pornography or watching strip dancing, but even romance novels and movies will lead anyone astray.  One might think that because this is all in the mind and only in one's imagination that it will not be evident.  But besides God knowing about it, it does become obvious in a relationship when the other person is having an emotional affair, even if "the person" is fictitious or unobtainable.  

Lust is a sin, and it will create a division.  Other people can seem far more alluring when you are not around them that much, or they are unobtainable fantasies.  Our minds can so very easily build up people and put them on a pedestal to be worshipped and adored.  This isn't healthy to do that with one's spouse, so it most certainly isn't healthy to do that regarding another person.

A strong prayer life will help us stay on the path of discretion and honor.  I would even put this forward as a healthy challenge.  Instead of just asking God that He remove a certain temptation from our hearts, it is important to confess any sins, even those of the heart.  Then ask God to help us focus on what is pure and honorable.  If we just keep asking God to help us avoid acting on a certain sin, a certain sin, a certain sin... We will remain hyper-focused on that certain sin.  Let's say, for example, that you have a weakness for chocolate, and then you are told NOT to think about chocolate... this will suddenly be all you think about.

We can ask God to help us remain focused on Him, and keep us looking to Him to satisfy us, fulfill us, and complete us, which will bring peace to our heart and mind.  When we are content in the Lord, we will not be so apt to covet the world or think that we are missing out on something.  Even though something wrong looks good or feels good... It helps to know that it is deceptive and only leads to destruction.

In summary, if one is single, in order to find the "right one" for marriage - it is most wise - to NOT be looking!  Live in God's will and work on having a strong relationship with the Lord (so that you know how to work on having a strong relationship with others).  Stay on this path, walking with the Lord, and then if and when someone is walking beside you in the same direction - introduce yourself!

If one is married, not only are we to keep sex within marriage, but God commands us to continue enjoying sex with our spouse.  When we have saved sex for marriage, that saying "sex stops after marriage" does NOT apply, because it's only getting started!  And - it will continue to get better and better and better...  If there are issues at any time (or to read just before your wedding day), there are excellent Christian books like "The Act of Marriage" by Tim and Beverly LaHaye.

Other things that will help in this department is when both spouses desire to please the other.  As well, a strong, healthy relationship with each other is very necessary!  Therefore, continue dating each other.  Treat your spouse as you want to be treated.  Treat your spouse as more important than yourself.  Think about how you are respecting, understanding, serving and encouraging your spouse.  Don't ask what you are getting out of the marriage, but ask yourself what you are putting into the marriage.  Pray together, study the Bible together, or at least discuss with your spouse the things that God has been teaching you.

It takes a lot of work to have a marriage that works, because even when we don't want to, we will still sin, and we will still hurt each other.  When we are wrong, quickly apologize, whether the other person forgives or not.  When the other person is wrong, quickly forgive, whether the other person apologizes or not.  As soon as there are issues, work towards reconciliation.  

All of this requires that we continually keep God and our relationship with Him as our top priority.  And then with His love, strength and wisdom, continue to work on the marriage.