relationships (Song of Solomon 1:1-4) Experiencing Oneness

(Song of Solomon 1:1-17 [-8:14])

The Song of Songs, which is Solomon’s.

2   “May he kiss me with the kisses of his mouth!
     For your love is sweeter than wine.
3   Your oils have a pleasing fragrance,
     Your name is like purified oil;
     Therefore the young women love you.
4   Draw me after you and let’s run together!
     The king has brought me into his chambers.”

     “We will rejoice in you and be joyful;
     We will praise your love more than wine.
     Rightly do they love you.”

TODAY'S THOUGHTS AND MEDITATION:

Solomon was very wise, but he certainly wasn't perfect.  He had many wives and concubines, just like his father.  Well, since King David was also a man after God's own heart, whenever he realized he had erred, he repented and corrected his way.  In Ecclesiastes, we saw that King Solomon had explored all of man's ways, including sexual immorality, and his final assessment was that it was all vanity.  Only having a relationship with the Lord gave one purpose, life and wisdom.  

So just like his father, here Solomon had found his one true love, and in this book, he writes about his courtship and marriage to this particular woman.  Therefore, all singles can use these verses as inspiration to guide one towards waiting for and finding a worthy spouse.  And as Solomon and this woman did, one is to wait for marriage to have sex.  

While it is an excellent idea to find quiet places to get to know one another very well, there should be other people near by, to minimize temptations as well as to avoid the appearances of evil.  Solomon would have had many servants and attendants in the vicinity and within his chambers.  We see later in this book that they even respected all of the cultural proprieties.

While these particular verses refer to the courtship of Solomon and his fiancée, both husbands and wives can use these verses as inspiration as to how to cherish one's spouse.  I love the imagery that verse 4 invokes.  The wife should ask and allow her husband to take the lead, so that they can run together.  

Wives, we need to be willing to respect our husband, while lovingly encouraging him to take the lead, and being excited about that.  This should apply, not just to the act of marriage, but to the entire marriage.  Now, specifically regarding sex, this does not mean a wife cannot ever be the one to initiate (as we will see later in this book).  But let us do so in a way that is not immoral, demeaning or emasculating!

With that, verse 4 would be an encouragement for husbands to actually take the lead, so that both you and your wife may run together... as one flesh, in love and unity.  As well, be sweet and tender to your wife so that you both can delight in each other!  Again, this should apply, not just to love-making, but to the entire marriage.

On the topic of sex, itself, recently I heard a message on the purpose of sex, which (besides procreation) is to experience oneness.  In this "oneness", as the two have become one flesh, it is something that we are to experience with no one else.  Meanwhile, pleasure is only the outcome, and not the purpose, just like with eating!  While eating can be pleasurable, the purpose of eating is to actually nourish and strengthen the body.  God, in His goodness and wisdom, created it to be this way!  Therefore, it is not "just sex", it is a very special experience to uphold and cherish only within the covenant of marriage!